Friday, July 4, 2008

MMBBL Welcomes Three New Squads

As you may know, the MMBBL is gaining popularity, and as a direct result we are pleased to announce the addition of three new teams to join a roster of eight for the upcoming Blood Bowl Summer season.

First to arrive are the Blackwater Bilgerunners, a Skaven squad loaded with speed and skill. With more on their arrival we have a report from our dwarven correspondent, Rock Blottem.

The Blackwater Bilgerunners, hailing from the sewers of an unnamed Imperium city, enter the MMBBL’s Summer Season Blood Bowl campaign for the first time under the sponsorship of Baron Blackwater of Clan Moulder. Eager to regain the honour of former Skaven greats like the Skavenblight Scramblers (and ease his infamously lethal boredom), the Baron has graciously donated much to his team, and a great deal of the talent comes from his own personal guard. The roster includes gutter runners Twinkletoes, Piddlepaw, and Dingleberry; Stormvermin bodyguards Brutus and Jenner as blitzers; Fivel Mausketrap serving as thrower; as well as a team of plucky linerats culled from the peasantry.

We are assured that the shivering and high pitched squeals of Limpy, Gimpy, Lamefist, Stumptail, Krunch, and Squeesplat are those of ecstasy at the prospect of upholding Skavenblight honour, rather than fear for their own personal survival or the well-being of their families.

What was once a league built around mere brute force is now showing room for skilled teams, it would appear. The Fly-by Knights, followed by the agile Blueriver Wardoves, and now the Blackwater Bilgerunners; we'll see how talent measures up against force in the upcoming season! Moving on to the second new team, we move away from the skittishness and skill of the Skaven to a more balanced combination of stoutness, sneakiness, and speed: The chaos dwarf team known as Traumatic Takedown. With the report, we have junior goblin correspondent Smerk Noseminer.

The Traumatic Takedown is just disembarking from their caravan after a long journey from the mountains, and...augh! AUUUUGH! AAAAWWWRAAAGH!
...


It appears that we'll have to wait for more information about the Takedown, though by the sounds of things, Smerk has gotten an exclusive interview with their bull centaur!

Finally, the third team to join the league, and joining the Traumatic Takedown in the Bloodbath division, are the enigmatic Bloodsand Blasters. Shipped in from their native Ogodytsot Desert in a series of crates, these undead warriors represent a chapter in the history of Blood Bowl that was written before many other teams even got around to crawling out of the swamp on two legs. An ancient textbook marked by hieroglyphics as the "Tome of Takkul'bal" shows a field of play similar to the Blood Bowl pitch, but with a noticeable lack of end zones. It would seem that the Bloodsand Blasters and their predecessors had no concept of "points" and simply played until everyone was dead or collapsed from heatstroke.

We have not been able to secure an interview with anyone directly affiliated with the Blasters yet. We do, however, have access to their current roster, which was dropped off at the MMBBL headquarters. After half an hour of wresting it from the jaws of the delivery animal (crocodiles are not particularly cooperative) We are now able to present it to the public. Their coach is listed as the Divine Takkul, the actual author of the ancient playbook. Among their ranks are eight lesser skeletal beings and four, that's right, FOUR mummies. We have seen how much damage the two mummies of the Dusk Hill Dirt Bursters can cause. Having four on the pitch at once is sure to be absolute carnage. The roster itself is as follows.

Lesser Skeletal Servants: Dirty Suez, Cairo Practor, Cal Ciferous, Dusty Tombs, Mister Urns, Gus Sarcopha, Sahket Toomi, and Helter Skeleter.

Great and Wise Tyrants of the Sands: Old Giza, West Nile Cyrus, Durdurhotep, and Battering Ramses.

A strange and terrifying bunch, indeed. We hope to learn more about these terrors from beyond the sands of time as they are unpacked and reassembled in their imported pyramid. Hopefully we'll have more on them, the Traumatic Takedown, and the Blackwater Bilgerunners as the season nears its beginning! Look forward to more in the coming days, including the Chaos Cup end-of-season awards!



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