Greetings, sportsfiends! We've got more MMBBL action for you right now, with a special report out of Fjord Stadium from skaven correspondent Bryag Mudrake.
It’s challenge match day at Fjord Stadium, where the Smash and Gonads have invited the Blackwater Bilgerunners for another pulse-pounding match! The field of combat was as firm and unyielding as always, as the two teams faced off to the joy of 27,000 screaming fans. Sponsored by Bloodweiser, the extravagant beer tent must have drawn away some of the dwarves, giving a slight edge in the stands to the skaven crew.
The sun was dazzling in the cloudless sky as the Go'nads put the boot to the ball, giving Fivel Mausketrap time to get underneath it and make the catch. Beatings began on the front line as the Bilgerunners proceeded to punch a hole in the dwarven defenses. Fivel, used to the dim light of the sewers, must have caught an eye full of sunlight as he tossed the ball, missing Dingleberry and giving the dwarves a chance to get some safeties around the ball. Running-red-faced for the bobbled catch, Fivel scooped up the ball to the jeering of fans and handed it off to Dingleberry, who was off for the end-zone in a flash, with the other two gutter runners flanking.
Trying to tie up the defenders at midfield, Stumptail came down hard on Moe Lester, who was dragged off the field, and sat out the rest of the game with a very large keg of complementary Bloodweiser Red for company. Adam Meway and Dick Gozinia did their level best to strip away the defending gutter runners, but a good leap by Dingleberry put the score at 1-0 for the Bilgerunners.
Either thrilled by the touchdown or driven into a frenzy from the blood and free booze, the Skaven poured into the quarry, followed quickly by the dwarves. The brutal brawl left most of the dwarven team stunned, including both Dick Gozinia and Adam Meway, and almost all the skaven team standing. As the dwarven team chased the rowdy fans off the pitch, the skaven defenders were quickly sprinting downfield, to try and recover the ball before the dwarven runners could get on their feet. Meway, staggering to his feet, beat them to the ball. As a squad of blockers dragged O’Rattigan down at midfield, Meway lobbed off a pass to Dick Gozinia just as he was taken down by the Blackwater linerats.
Running for the safety of the midfield line, Gozinia caught a glimpse of an enraged O’Rattigan rearing up and staggering towards him, swinging madly. The tidal wave of rage crashed onto the immobile shores of dwarven defense however, allowing Gozinia time to get into strong coverage. With time running out, Stumptail tried to rush the runner, but was tackled by Achilles Punks, allowing Dick Gozinia to put a knot in the game in the last seconds of the first half.
As the second half begun, the chug and whistle of dwarven machinery heralded the arrival of Cludge Slamboni and his deathroller of doom. It also resulted in the completely predictable riot at the Bilgerunner coaching staff, team, and fans screamed for the infernal engines removal. The clock continued to tick down as the teams shouted, finally settling with a kick to the Go’nads well into the second half. The Mid-field massacre was predictable, with stunned rats lying in the wake of the massive machine. Less predictable was Twistknee smashing Herb Eaverstinks leaving him lying unsettlingly still on the field. He was quickly dragged back to the infirmary where, after much work, he was pronounced as being alive, but in critical need of large amounts of alcohol. He will be spending the next game recovering from his injuries, and possible hangovers.
To make matters worse, the skaven at midfield managed to get a good shot at Dick Gozinia as he reached the halfway point, but this time, the panicked toss missed its mark, and the ball fell free, just behind the dwarven line. The skaven made a strong attempt to recover, with Fivel running downfield to attempt to receive, and Krunch making a play for the ball. Krunch fumbled the pickup through, allowing the dwarves to smash their way back into possession, as Adam Meway grabbed the ball, and was surrounded by his angry teammates. Krunch was unceremoniously shoved into the beer tent at mid-field by Stu Padasso, where the angry fans promptly beat him severely. He will be missing the next game.
The skaven had managed to tie the dwarves up at midfield as the clock ran down, and it was now obvious to the Go’nads that there was no time to manage a winning touchdown. This certainly didn’t stop them from trying to smash their way through, however, as Achilles Punks wounded Squeesplat severely, Holden McGroin bludgeoned Notchear, and Gil T. Azell smashed Brutus for another significant injury. With time running out, Jenner tried one last chance to get the ball away from the dwarven defenses, but was tackled by Achilles in the final moments, ending the game.
Match MVPs went to Storm vermin Brutus, and Dwarf Blocker Achilles Punks, apparently for the participation in the “Injury of the week” highlight play of the game.
Thanks for that report, Bryag! Check back again soon, fans, for more MMBBL action!
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