Monday, January 19, 2009
Mummy Bags Two Berserkers Early; Blasters Win on the Road
The third match from Tuesday's Bloodbath Division action saw the Bloodsand Blasters travel from their searing desert home to visit chilly Mjaddersen Skvar Garden to play the host Fjord Rangers. Needless to say, the turnout for the Norse squad was nearly double that of the undead, as historically, the two cultures have very little love for one another. The Blasters were the most experienced squad, and to account for the difference, the Rangers spent a lot of extra time on the practice field beforehand. Optimism abounded among the chilly fans of the Fjord.
That optimism was short-lived, however. As soon as the game was underway, with the Blasters receiving first, mummy Durdurhotep went on an absolute rampage. Making two consecutive blocks up on the line, he managed to injure both of the Rangers' berserkers one after the other! Dag Thoresen was soundly battered to the point of being unable to play out the rest of the game, while Olov Rudberg took some nasty damage to his ribs and is expected to miss the Rangers' next match as well. This near-instantaneous shift in numbers brought about some inspired play from the Blasters' usually suspect offense, with Hork Ptah hurling a pass to Sahket Toomi, who fell in behind a trio of skeletal helpers and shambled his way into the end zone for the opening score.
Down but not out, the Rangers put their own offense to work right away. A strong downfield pass from thrower Niklas Jannson was on-target, but slipped through the hands of runner Gjermund Forssell. It seemed like the Blasters might take advantage of the miscue, but instead they made an error of their own. Blitzer Sheik Yirbouti attempted a block against lineman Valter Franzen, but Franzen simply twisted the skeleton's bony hands until they popped off of his forearms, leaving Yirbouti useless for the rest of the game and almost certainly for another match, given how much time it will take for a specialist to get a look at this ugly case of Vorpal Tunnel Syndrome.
The Rangers weren't able to immediately cash in on this mistake as Jannson couldn't get a decent grip on the ball. Hork Ptah attempted to gain control of it, and succeeded, only to blow the pass to Dusty Tombs. needing to clear some space, ulfwerener Sigvard Hoglund laid out Cal Ciferous and howled to declare that he was open. Seeing the opportunity and managing to focus on the ball over the constant din of rattling bones, Niklas Jannson scrambled for the ball, popped his head and arm out of the pile and lobbed a pass to Hoglund, who charged his way home for the touchdown. Tie game!
Shortly before halftime, the two teams seemed to finally crack under the weight of their mutual dislike. Fouls began to erupt from both sides of the field, though Hork Ptah did manage a quick pass to Cal Ciferous before the whistle blew to end the first period of play.
The bad blood persisted after the break, and all pretense of a good, clean game was dropped as Niklas Jannson fumbled the ball on his first pass attempt. Eventually he got it back and tried another throw, but this time was inaccurate and missed his target by a country mile. Khemri mummy Battering Ramses took no notice, though, as he was too busy kicking and stomping on the Norse linemen. He managed to knock out both Valter Franzen and Jonas Mednick before the referee, approaching cautiously with a bucket of holy water, tossed him out. the damage to the Rangers' line, however, was already done, and the Blasters once again took advantage of the manpower advantage. A pass from Hork Ptah, his third of the game, connected with Cairo Practor, and the skilled skeleton scampered downfield to score.
As time wound down, a few half-hearted boots were dished out, but the game was essentially over. As the final horn blew, the Bloodsand Blasters walked away from Mjaddersen Skvar Garden with their first victory of the season.
MVP awards for this match went to Sahket Toomi, who threw a picture-perfect stiff-arm on his way in for the touchdown, and 9surprisingly) to Olov Rudberg, possibly for getting out while the getting was good. Additional marks go to Rangers' ulfwerener Sigvard Hoglund for his key blocking, as well as to Blasters mummy Durdurhotep for his little rampage early on, and thrower Hork Ptah for completing three passes despite not having any muscles to speak of.
Be sure to join us again soon for Bloodbath's final match report for this week.